Month: March 2013

Women, Comparison & Love

~ womeninlivingness

by Anonymous

Having grown up with 3 sisters, I know all about comparison and jealousy and competing for attention… And I know all about covering things up with niceties, manners and politeness when presenting to the rest of the world, yet knowing full well the feelings that are underlying between us.

When I reflect now, it’s sad to feel the way that we were with each other and in some ways, still are. How is it that 5 beautiful women (including my mum) were all living in the same house and, for a lot of the time, there were unspoken resentments, jealousies and judgments towards one another. It’s been hard to admit, but if I am really honest, that is the truth. And I played a full part in that. It is painful to feel that I measured myself constantly with my sisters and also with my parent’s expectations. Instead of expressing and getting it all out there in the open, we tended to hold things in and keep it all under lock and key, letting it all build up – with the inevitable emotional explosions from time to time. And all the while, so often our words and actions were laced with the insidiousness of anger, frustration or disappointment under the guise of ‘politeness’ or ‘niceness’. Continue reading “Women, Comparison & Love” →

Letting go of ‘Trying to Fit In’

~ womeninlivingness

by Donna Gianniotis, Yoga Teacher, Sydney, Australia

I couldn’t help but feel the joy and the loveliness in the room at the recently held Women’s Group Presentation hosted by Natalie Benhayon in Sydney.

This led me to ponder  – I’ve been in many a room with women only, but why did this feel different?

The answer revealed itself throughout the afternoon: my conclusion being that here we were, a group of close to 100 women openly expressing in our honesty about how we live our lives. We explored various challenges that we may face living as women today, with one of the biggest of these being how we, as women, tend to want to ‘fit in’.  And how ‘fitting in’ takes us away from keeping our own personal rhythms that could truly support us and allow us a deeper connection to ourselves. Continue reading “Letting go of ‘Trying to Fit In’” →

New Period and Full Moon Diary App And So Much More

~ womeninlivingness

by AP, Sydney, Australia

I was really looking forward to hearing Natalie Benhayon talk about the new ‘Period and Full Moon Diary’ App she was launching. This is not just for women who are still menstruating, but is also just as applicable for menopausal women, like me, or even young women who haven’t started their periods yet. This new App will be a perfect way to record how I’m feeling from day to day so I can see when there’s a pattern emerging. Was I frustrated for just a few days, or was it actually a lot more than that?… and if so, I can then think about what caused that frustration. Did something happen at work, or with a friend? With this honesty and awareness, I have the opportunity to make different choices moving forward. Maybe I speak up more when I’m with my friends and say how I really feel about something, rather than just going along with the group. Or at home, I could explain to my teenage sons that I’m really tired and would love some help with dinner, rather than feeling frustrated and then snapping at everyone because I’m annoyed that I’m doing everything myself! As we can make notes on a daily basis with the period diary, I can see how the changes I make affect me, not just on a daily basis, but also with regard to my cycle. I know how I am feeling each day, but I can honestly say that I can’t remember, with clarity, how I felt yesterday, let alone the days before. I’m really looking forward to using the App, specifically as I’d like to look back over the days and weeks to see what I can learn from it. Continue reading “New Period and Full Moon Diary App And So Much More” →

A Swimsuit for ME

~ womeninlivingness

by Felicity

I have read many stories of reclaiming from this Women in Livingness blog, but was hesitant to offer one myself as I felt I wasn’t quite there yet; that other women were doing it, claiming it, that is – living confidently as true women. Then I had a simple but profound experience that showed me what I have let go of, and how I am more honoring of me.

Recently, I had to buy some new bathers and I felt a few long-term insecurities just sitting there under the surface. I had no intention of indulging them, but I knew they were there waiting for a chance to go on a rampage, if I allowed it.

I went to a shop and picked out a few swimsuits to try on. One felt wrong as soon as I put it on. In fact it was so wrong because it was designed to press so strongly on my body as if trying to twist my upper chest into an ideal ‘look’ according to someone else, which felt like it was controlling my shoulders in some kind of compression. It fitted ok, but that was not the point. It just felt so wrong on my body because… well, because it didn’t allow me to be me. How huge to allow myself to feel this! Continue reading “A Swimsuit for ME” →

Accepting Being a Woman

~ womeninlivingness

by Mrs Sandra Wilson, Brisbane, Australia, Master of Arts (MA)

I am 67 years old and am only just starting to accept myself as a woman.

I have been the dutiful daughter, the faithful wife and the caring mother. I played hippie, athlete, academic, all in an attempt to find meaning in life. Rarely have I been simply who I am as a woman, without trying to live up to other people’s expectations and to my own impossible ideals of how a perfect person should be.

When I looked in the mirror, the image looked gaunt and wasted. It is only since attending Universal Medicine courses that I realised how this came about. I had put myself through many hardships in order to prove that I was as good as any man. I spent many a night in wet bunks on ocean racing boats; many a night sleeping out under the stars in wild country; rock climbing or looking for aboriginal cave paintings. I brought up two children in a remote area without power or running water. For me then, it was a challenging adventure, but it was fuelled by a desperate need for love… Continue reading “Accepting Being a Woman” →

The Birth of A Woman

~ womeninlivingness ~ 3 Comments

by Dr Rachel Hall, Dentist, Kenmore Australia

Around 2 years ago a small group of Brisbane women began meeting approximately every 6 weeks to talk about and raise awareness of women’s health.

These meetings commenced by exploring that despite advances in healthcare and preventive medicine, women’s health was actually worsening, with ever increasing cases of breast lumps, breast cancer, hormonal problems, fibroids, endometriosis, problem periods and fertility issues.

This initial discussion gave rise to an interesting but very exposing concept that women’s health issues may stem from the way we are choosing to live our lives, and how we are as women. But what did that mean, and what did it look like? Continue reading “The Birth of A Woman” →

The Texting Game. Innocent or not so Innocent?

~ womeninlivingness

by Beverley Brown, Norfolk, UK

I recently had an experience which I feel to share. To set the scene, my partner and I live together; the endeavour of us both is to maintain a commitment to live and grow in love together.

Recently I received a text from a (very) ex-boyfriend and we communicated briefly. I did not tell my partner at first, until he was present when a text or two arrived and only then did I offer information. This texting communication was to me just a random communication with someone whom I had known for many years, and I did not think too much of it. (First stage of ignorance!)

I spoke to my partner as I noticed that he seemed a little out of sorts, and with this he eventually owned up to not feeling very comfortable about the texts. Again I brushed it off and spoke with him about his own insecurities in the relationship – I made it all his problem and not mine (Second stage of ignorance! And a huge dose of arrogance, to assume it was nothing for me to look at). Continue reading “The Texting Game. Innocent or not so Innocent?” →

Women in Conversation

~ womeninlivingness ~ 2 Comments

by JK, UK

I have come to realise the power of expression, and the amazing potential that conversations with amongst women have to help every woman feel and reflect on their lives and the world around them – the importance of being earnest, and true to oneself.

Today whilst in conversation with other women, I realised for instance that two years ago I didn’t feel I knew how to be a true woman. I was born as a woman, I had a woman’s body, I could be a caring sister, a thoughtful daughter, a diligent colleague, a kind neighbour, but none of them felt like they were truly me, they felt more like roles I played. Today, two years on, having been inspired by other women and having had the opportunity for many conversations with women, I can feel that I am now starting to feel myself as a woman, in that I can feel tenderness, gentleness, and a loveliness in the way I move. I can feel a delicateness in the way I touch things, and I can feel a beauty deep within me – whatever clothes I am wearing on the outside. More so, I can feel a far deeper confidence as a woman, not that I now know all there is to be a woman, but that I have given myself the opportunity to give it a go, to experiment with the way I lovingly care for myself on a daily basis, and to be open to learning more about being a woman at work, or with friends and relatives, and in the way I am in the world.  Continue reading “Women in Conversation” →