Category: BODY IMAGE

A Swimsuit for ME

~ womeninlivingness

by Felicity

I have read many stories of reclaiming from this Women in Livingness blog, but was hesitant to offer one myself as I felt I wasn’t quite there yet; that other women were doing it, claiming it, that is – living confidently as true women. Then I had a simple but profound experience that showed me what I have let go of, and how I am more honoring of me.

Recently, I had to buy some new bathers and I felt a few long-term insecurities just sitting there under the surface. I had no intention of indulging them, but I knew they were there waiting for a chance to go on a rampage, if I allowed it.

I went to a shop and picked out a few swimsuits to try on. One felt wrong as soon as I put it on. In fact it was so wrong because it was designed to press so strongly on my body as if trying to twist my upper chest into an ideal ‘look’ according to someone else, which felt like it was controlling my shoulders in some kind of compression. It fitted ok, but that was not the point. It just felt so wrong on my body because… well, because it didn’t allow me to be me. How huge to allow myself to feel this! Continue reading “A Swimsuit for ME” →

Accepting Being a Woman

~ womeninlivingness

by Mrs Sandra Wilson, Brisbane, Australia, Master of Arts (MA)

I am 67 years old and am only just starting to accept myself as a woman.

I have been the dutiful daughter, the faithful wife and the caring mother. I played hippie, athlete, academic, all in an attempt to find meaning in life. Rarely have I been simply who I am as a woman, without trying to live up to other people’s expectations and to my own impossible ideals of how a perfect person should be.

When I looked in the mirror, the image looked gaunt and wasted. It is only since attending Universal Medicine courses that I realised how this came about. I had put myself through many hardships in order to prove that I was as good as any man. I spent many a night in wet bunks on ocean racing boats; many a night sleeping out under the stars in wild country; rock climbing or looking for aboriginal cave paintings. I brought up two children in a remote area without power or running water. For me then, it was a challenging adventure, but it was fuelled by a desperate need for love… Continue reading “Accepting Being a Woman” →

Real Beauty versus Outer Looks

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by Aimee Edmonds, Mackay, Australia

For most of my life, I have looked out at the world and others to see how they were living – believing the answers of how to be a woman were ‘out there’, or held in other people. I thought if I looked like, talked like, or was more intelligent like others, then I would be happy… I would be content. One of the sad things about this picture (and there are plenty), is that I missed out on meeting and truly appreciating other girls and women for who they were… and they, in turn, missed out on meeting me for who I truly am.

Can you relate to this – looking outside of yourself for validation that you are enough, that you are doing enough or that you tick the boxes as being the ‘perfect’ partner, mother, friend, daughter or employee? There is so much out there showing us that we need to be more, do more or look a certain way. We see it in teenage and women’s magazines, on T.V., and from other women – what our body, home, children or job should look like, and how we should have it all together. Continue reading “Real Beauty versus Outer Looks” →

Me and My Hair

~ womeninlivingness

by Shevon Simon, London, England

As I sit here twisting my hair I keep having thoughts of how beautiful it is and how beautiful I am.

What a turnaround!

The changes both in and towards myself began to occur three years ago, when I started regular sessions with an Esoteric Healing Practitioner in London. At this time my hair was at its worst. It was in its natural state as I had stopped all the pressing, chemical relaxing and even blow drying which had started at least 7-10 years earlier. However, my hair was still thinning and falling out. The purpose of having these healing sessions wasn’t to do with my hair at all, and in fact ‘my hair state’ was only ever mentioned once. The reason I chose to have these sessions was to feel better in my body, since at the time I was living with an enormous amount of emotional pain and stress. Slowly, slowly as I began to make changes in my life, and lifestyle, I turned my attention to my hair. I began by buying quality products, noticing the effects that such products had upon my hair, and also seeking professional help from a Trichologist. This all helped me to understand my hair, and what it needed to help repair it. Continue reading “Me and My Hair” →

The Things l’ve Done to Find the True Woman

~ womeninlivingness

by Jenny Ellis, Practitioner and Director: UniMed Brisbane, Australia 

I started my forays into personal growth and healing back in the late 90’s when I found myself with everything that was supposed to make me feel successful and good about myself  – good relationship, a handsome, attentive partner, good job opportunities, a nice place to live, supportive family and a lovely young son. Yet I felt far from satisfied inside, and knew it wasn’t that I had higher ideas of what life should be – since I had what I’d always thought I wanted.

I realise in retrospect that it was how I felt about myself as a woman that was my main source of dis-content – unattractive, inadequate and lacking in confidence pretty much sums it up. There was always a ‘there’ I never seemed to get to, as far as feeling good about myself for any length of time.

I was in fact, far from unattractive or inadequate, but I felt it and had great ways of covering this up. Continue reading “The Things l’ve Done to Find the True Woman” →

I Am Beautiful

~ womeninlivingness

by Bianca Barban, Melbourne, Australia

So many things come up when I think about how I look. First thing that pops up is, am I allowed to say that out loud? Will people look at me and judge me? Will they break down every part of me and add it back together and decide “NO, you are wrong – this is not true”. Or worse, will they think I am arrogant and laugh at my apparent lack of humility, and be critical.

I Am Beautiful and I have a deep knowing that when I was a child I knew my true beauty. It was real, it was tangible, it was full and ever present. It was confirmed in me! So what happened? Now, when I stand in front of the mirror I pick myself apart. I hear the messages of self-loathing in my head: my skin looks dry, I am getting wrinkles, my tummy is too round, my thighs too bumpy… STOP! Continue reading “I Am Beautiful” →

My New Bra

~ womeninlivingness

by L (aged 22 years), The Netherlands

Two days ago I finally went shopping to buy a new bra. A friend of mine highly recommended a certain nice store, and so my friend and I went to visit.

This shop was amazing! A store full of bras, all stocked in piles in their little cabins. The (bra fitting) assistant was very kind and straightforward and knew exactly what type and size of bra would fit me. At first I was a little, “Ooh no! I don’t wear a C cup, I always have B or even A”. But after trying the B cup first, I actually felt the lady was right – I did need a C cup, which I normally don’t wear! So then she came with a pile of bras for me to try. With the loving support and good advice of my friend and also the assistant, I found two very well fitting bras which also looked amazing. And I can say that it was the first time in my life I had found a bra that fitted my body so beautifully. Some beautiful underwear also came with the bras, so I decided to buy them as a set. Continue reading “My New Bra” →

Permission to Wear a Dress

~ womeninlivingness

by Anonymous

I grew up with a belief that I was not beautiful. I felt like the ugly duckling in my family. My mother and her sisters were very petite, had dark hair and brown eyes. I on the other hand was tall, had blonde hair and blue eyes and was told by many that I had a good ‘solid’ build, a word which I grew up to detest.

When I was introduced for the first time to work colleagues of my parents or people that my parents knew, it was always joked about that I couldn’t be my mother’s daughter and where did I come from (“was I adopted?”) as they couldn’t believe how physically different we were. Although I laughed along I was always ashamed by this and ashamed of my looks, height and build. I felt I could never be a woman because I wasn’t small and I didn’t look like the women in my family. I had a picture that you needed to be small and petite to be a girl or a woman and because I didn’t fit this picture I loathed how I looked. I also believed that you could only ever ask for help, show you were upset or be vulnerable if you were small and delicately framed. Continue reading “Permission to Wear a Dress” →

Knowing What’s Right for Me…

~ womeninlivingness

As a child, I was comfortable in my body and had never consciously considered the question “What’s right for me?”… it was just naturally how I was. When I was 12 or 13 years old, I went through a growth spurt and became quite skinny very quickly. Around the same time I felt to start eating differently. I didn’t want meat pies, pizza, fish and chips or Macca’s (McDonald’s) on Fridays or the weekends. And I didn’t want cheesy sauces on my veggies, or chips, or cheese and bikkies for snacks during the day. There were also many meals that I didn’t feel like eating at all and wanted to skip. I began to be more aware of what was ‘good’ and ‘not so good’ and what was right for me and my body in terms of nutrition and my health.

I also began to enjoy exercise and loved my daily walk/jog around our neighborhood, exploring all the parks and secret pathways. I had felt to start this little exercise routine because I had done a fitness test in school grade 7 PE which involved a 1.5km walk/jog. This was the first test I had done and my body felt really heavy, sluggish and sore; I’d been surprised I couldn’t do it, not having ever done an endurance exercise before, only sprints in running and swimming.

My body began to change – not just the shape, but also how I felt. Continue reading “Knowing What’s Right for Me…” →

My Haircut – My masterpiece!

~ womeninlivingness

by Sally Scott, Perth, Australia

Getting a haircut is something that we all do – whether it be in a professional salon, visiting someone who works from home, having it done by a family member or friend, or maybe even doing it yourself. We all experience it.

For me, hairdressing salons have always been confronting I have been to small ones, large ones, cheaper ones, very expensive ones, trendy ones and those set up from home. In the past I have found them so intimidating: walking into a space with what I perceived to be lots of beautiful people walking around wearing amazing clothes and parading some very funky hair-dos. There is, of course, generally some sort of music being played, and then to top it all off, you take a seat in front of a mirror where you get to look at yourself and wait until the hairdresser is ready for you. Continue reading “My Haircut – My masterpiece!” →