by Priscila, 35yrs, UK
I never paid much attention or given much importance to my little finger (or any of my fingers), not until something affected them would I notice.
Have you ever had a finger cut from a sheet of paper? Yes, a sheet of paper! I didn’t know how sharp a sheet of paper could be until I cut myself with one by accident… or should I say by perhaps being distracted with multi-tasking?! And then you have to use your hands for cooking, writing, dressing yourself, having a shower etc. and realise how it affects your activities and how much you miss your little finger (and it hurts too!). Until that moment I had no idea I had a little finger! And more so, that a finger could actually ‘speak’!!!! How our body talks to us is amazing.
Ovaries and the Contraceptive Pill
And how about ovaries? How might they ‘speak’ to us? I’m a woman; I was born into a woman’s body with two ovaries. I’ve also studied anatomy and physiology extensively and yet there was not a moment that I considered those two little cute balls were inside of me! Well, I knew I had them but it was as if they were just ‘there’, somewhere… I hadn’t really considered them to be a part of me.
I started taking the contraceptive pill when I was a teenager and continued to take it on and off over the past 20 years; at times for continuous periods without any breaks. Looking back, not having a ‘natural period’ I was asking my body to function ‘just like a machine’ – to be able to perform whatever task I needed it to do or complete and whenever I wanted it to. I did not want to stop nor have any interruption to what I was doing in life; I did not want to listen to my body.
Three years ago I decided to stop taking the contraceptive pill. I knew it could take a while for my period to come back seeming I had been on the pill for almost 20 years. After all my body would need some time re-adjusting itself.
So one year passed and no period. OK, I thought… adjusting ‘period’. (pun intended!)
Another year passed and no sign of a period. Hmmm 2 ½ years later and still no period?! I then decided it was time to investigate this further and sought conventional medical support alongside the support of different esoteric practitioners.
I had many tests and the blood tests showed a ‘hormonal alteration’, this affects the way my ovaries work. The Doctor says ‘my ovaries are lazy’. For me they do not feel lazy… more they just feel tired… tired of being neglected for so long.
Using My Body as a Study for Observation
I had never used my body as a study, as an observation and reflection of how I was living – not until recently. Over the last 3 years of being inspired by teachings from Universal Medicine and Esoteric Women’s Health modalities like the Esoteric Breast Massage and Esoteric Ovary Massage, I’m learning that my body responds to gentleness, self-care, self-loving choices, self-awareness and delicateness.
My body responds to the way I treat it.
I used to get little cuts and bruises on my hands and have my nails chipped quite a lot. It now happens only very occasionally. Today I stop to appreciate how beautiful and delicate my hands are and feel – they respond to the way I care about how I touch things. I protect them to do washing and cleaning housework and when it’s cold – I simply love taking care of them. When I do get a cut, a bruise or a chipped nail these days, it’s a sign for me that I’ve pushed myself hard; that I have not been paying attention to what I am doing and that I have not been present with my hands while performing a task.
And How about My Ovaries?
I went for a walk this afternoon and was feeling gorgeous! Just before going for my walk, I did some gentle stretching as I was feeling my body was a bit stiff. I walked moving my hips freely with every step, walking gently, feeling how delicate and yummy my body is – just like the white butterfly that passed in front of me in the middle of the rose garden in the park!
At that moment, I ‘checked-in’ with my ovaries. I have been feeling them more and more nowadays and they do ‘speak’ a lot – two little chatterboxes!! (Before I would only pay attention to them when they felt hard or slightly painful, but now I like to stop and feel my ovaries during the day, as they are indeed a part of me; a part of my body to take note of). And my ovaries feel lovely, delicate, spacious, and warm, they pulse alive (!) So while I was walking I brought my attention to them… and they were there, just waiting for me to say “hi”. So I did and they signalled to me with a delicious ‘ahhh’ as if they were just resting and relaxing on the couch with some heated healing eye pillows on them!
Absent Periods – Conversing with My Ovaries
I can feel that my ovaries have actually never stopped ‘talking’ to me, not even when I might have felt so by their ‘non-functioning’… they have never let me down. My ovaries were with me all along and today I am choosing to hear and listen to what they are saying. In turn they are responding to the way I’ve been treating myself gently, lovingly, delicately and tenderly – they feel steady, solid and yet extremely delicate and tender.
My period has not yet returned and I don’t know when or if it will come back, even with the hormonal medication I’m taking at the moment. But it doesn’t matter. I now know that my body talks and speaks to me and that I’m now choosing to listen to it.
For I know that my beautiful, precious and sacred body responds to the way I treat it.