My Haircut – My masterpiece!

~ womeninlivingness

by Sally Scott, Perth, Australia

Getting a haircut is something that we all do – whether it be in a professional salon, visiting someone who works from home, having it done by a family member or friend, or maybe even doing it yourself. We all experience it.

For me, hairdressing salons have always been confronting I have been to small ones, large ones, cheaper ones, very expensive ones, trendy ones and those set up from home. In the past I have found them so intimidating: walking into a space with what I perceived to be lots of beautiful people walking around wearing amazing clothes and parading some very funky hair-dos. There is, of course, generally some sort of music being played, and then to top it all off, you take a seat in front of a mirror where you get to look at yourself and wait until the hairdresser is ready for you. Continue reading “My Haircut – My masterpiece!” →

I am a Regular Woman

~ womeninlivingness

by Janine Whitling, Dip App Sci – Naturopathy, Masters in Contemporary Art, Brisbane Australia

I am a regular woman, and person really, not much different to you. I grew up in a household which had difficulty expressing love: dad hid behind his work and was often sullen and quiet, mum tried like crazy to stay the dutiful wife, working and caring for the home. Both were so wrapped up in their own stuff that they often forgot about us, forgot how to spend time with us. Nothing new here – I know dozens of people who grew up like this.

At school I was teased… lots of kids were. I hated my looks (so did lots of other kids too) and I struggled to find a place in the world, trying so hard to fit in. I moulded myself to be whatever I needed to be so I wouldn’t be different, so that people would like me; anything to get an okay. Then, in my teens I started drinking, because that’s what ‘cool’ kids did. And in my twenties I started doing drugs, because that’s what ‘cool’ people did. And all at the same time I slept with whoever I could, just for some kind of attention and to feel popular. Continue reading “I am a Regular Woman” →

From Black Belt Kick Boxer to Tenderness

~ womeninlivingness

by JK, England

While I was having a long bath this morning, I took the time to appreciate how different my body feels lately. When I washed my feet, the hard skin that used to be on the balls of my feet has completely gone, the skin on my legs and arms and body is very soft and gentle, and my hair feels much thicker, shinier and healthier than it ever has. What I also felt was how much I can feel inside my body, and how sensitive (in a great and tender way) my body is to many things, such as the temperature of my bath water (not too hot or too cold) and the products I use on my body (for example, the ‘organic’ shampoo and conditioner I used today felt harsh and unloving – so I have binned it). And how I love to give myself ample time to take a long bath when I feel to. Boy, have I come a long way!

Fifteen years ago I was a junior black-belt kick boxer. I also cycled up mountains, did 100’s of press-ups and sit-ups as part of my kickboxing training, and regularly went jogging. I was, at that time, an associate director of a large healthcare organisation – and I used to turn up for work with bruises and broken toes (from the kickboxing). For anyone who doesn’t know me, I’m just about 5 foot tall, and very slight in build; I’ve pretty much always been this build, give or take a few pounds. I used to train with 6 foot-plus men for kickboxing – very few women got to junior black belt. I had a busy working life, working 50 to 60 hours a week and driving a round trip of 60 miles a day. I used to get so tired I couldn’t sleep, so I would buy a curry from the local Indian take-away and eat it to make me sleepy enough to sleep. I also ate chocolate and drank green tea to ‘pep’ me up when I felt tired during the day. Continue reading “From Black Belt Kick Boxer to Tenderness” →

A Space Just For Me

~ womeninlivingness ~ 2 Comments

by Gabriele Conrad, Goonellabah, Australia

This morning I looked around in my bedroom, felt how simple and supportive it was, and was reminded of all those years when I so yearned for a space where I could be with myself, take care of myself and look after myself.

In the past, I had always been keenly aware of how much I missed not doing things for myself; such as having a bath just for me, and not because I was chilled to the bone and a bath was the only way to warm up; such as having somewhere where I actually wanted to linger and where I could apply body lotion or cream; such as a space where I could take care of my hair rather than wear it so short that I never had to use a comb and never had to look at myself in the mirror. Continue reading “A Space Just For Me” →

Every Beautiful Woman

~ womeninlivingness

by Dr Lyndy Summerhaze, Crabbes Creek, NSW Australia

I had a dream a couple of weeks ago. I was window-shopping outside a jewellers / china shop. There were so many beautiful and colourful objects there, but when I looked at each individual item – there were actually none that I wanted. As I was leaving, I saw a life-size cardboard cut-out of a fashion model standing there – I didn’t want that either. So I walked away from it all, down the street.

As I was walking, in the dream, I remembered something Serge Benhayon, founder of Universal Medicine, had said to us some years ago whilst demonstrating a healing modality – the Energetic Facial Release. For those who may not be familiar with this healing technique, it is a release that can help deal with and clear emotions we hold within our face, such as sadness, frustration etc. It can rejuvenate the face to reveal a person’s natural radiant beauty, and can also have a profound healing effect on the whole body. What Serge said were words to the effect of – there is not one woman in the world who isn’t beautiful when connected to herself. Continue reading “Every Beautiful Woman” →

Mama Mia: Here I Go Again

~ womeninlivingness

by Sarah Davis, B.BSc, Grad Dip Applied Psychology, Australia

I have had many conversations recently with women about mothering. It has been truly lovely to connect and share openly – learning from each other’s reflections and supporting each other through honesty and inspiration. I find that the more honest I can be about how I have ‘approached’ motherhood, the more awareness I bring to how I have been living as a woman and how my body feels as a result of my choices. Often we share very similar accounts of the demands and ‘exhaustion’ of motherhood, as well as the intense ‘needs’ from our children, partners and society – well, as least that is how the conversation starts. Lately, these conversations have felt truly honest and inspiring as we explore more deeply ourselves as women within this experience and ‘dynamic’ of motherhood; the understanding that is developing is deeply inspiring and loving. Central to this unfolding is a claiming of our responsibility to make self-loving choices, and a commitment to self; basically that the ‘drama of motherhood’ is often a result of our own disregard and lack of self-worth – to the total detriment of our body and quality of relationships we adopt the maxim, the ‘tougher we do it’ the ‘better’ and ‘more committed’ mother we are. Correct? Continue reading “Mama Mia: Here I Go Again” →

Mum and Me

~ womeninlivingness

by JM and ML-M, NSW, Australia

The purpose behind us writing Mum and Me was for all to see that it is never too late to change the way we relate to our mothers and daughters, no matter what age they are or how dysfunctional our relationships may be. Through a loving commitment to ourselves first, then developing a true relationship with our mothers and daughters, we have the power in this generation to change patterns that have been passed down from mother to daughter for eons. Continue reading “Mum and Me” →

Sex, Drugs… and Making Love

~ womeninlivingness

by Kyla Plummer, Bangalow, Australia

My first experience of sex left a lot to be desired – I was 13 years old. My 17 year old boyfriend coerced and heavily pressured me into sex with stories of how a guy needs sex or his balls hurt; and how hard it is for guys because once they have it (sex, that is) it must happen regularly, or else etc… all lines designed to persuade a young and naïve target. I didn’t really even know that much of what was happening, but after heavy persistence I became worn down and gave in. Also, he could be quite scary and violent – at times there was no consent from me at all and he was quite forceful. In my desperation to grow up and be considered ‘mature’ I had found myself in this situation, spending every free hour at his run-down apartment, while at home my mother was beside herself with worry. Continue reading “Sex, Drugs… and Making Love” →

Fifty Shades of Grey

~ womeninlivingness

by Anonymous, Australia

This month’s Women’s Weekly printed an article on the phenomenon of the novel Fifty Shades of Grey. The article points out it is “far and away the fastest selling book in Australian history”. It has sold 20 million copies worldwide, more than Twilight and Harry Potter. This could indicate it is a fair barometer of where Western middle class women are at. A brief synopsis of the book is that it is about a virgin college graduate and a billionaire lover who has a bondage dungeon called ‘The Red Room of Pain’. She plays a completely submissive role, where the lover does everything for her and they engage in erotic sex, including bondage, riding crops and handcuffs.

The book’s Facebook page is full of reports of renewed vigour and libido in women’s lives – and very happy, satisfied husbands as a result. But what can we draw from this phenomenon? Could it be possible that the female readers, mainly married mothers (the book has been dubbed ‘mummy porn’), have been without deep intimacy and affection in their marriages, and to admit that their lives are lacking this deeper quality is too painful to face? The engaging of the eroticism from this book then suddenly has aroused a renewed vigour in the bedroom, and love is deemed to have been rediscovered in their lives – but maybe all that has happened is that more sex has substituted for a deeper intimacy and affection of love, and the painful absence of that previously being longed for, is abated. Continue reading “Fifty Shades of Grey” →

The Return of the Pad

~ womeninlivingness ~ 5 Comments

by Annette Baker, Sydney, Australia

If somebody had said to me six months ago that in a few months I would only be using pads during my period, and would no longer be using tampons, I would have laughed in disbelief, and probably a bit of embarrassment too. I had some pretty bad memories of using pads during the first year of having my period, and based on that experience, to me pads were ‘backward’, clumsy and messy, so I wasn’t about to go back there. As far as I was concerned pads were antiquated, and used only by much older women who had neither discovered nor enjoyed the convenience of tampons. So how is it that today, I sit here in the knowing that it is very unlikely I would choose to use a tampon again? Continue reading “The Return of the Pad” →