Rising out of my Refuge in Writing – Reclaiming my Expression

~ womeninlivingness

by Fumiyo Egashira, Japan

Everyday, I spend a fair amount of time on the Internet. I read various blogs and check out Facebook posts, but I hardly ever contribute my own input except for liking/sharing some posts every now and then. I remain pretty much invisible.

I have been OK with this position of mine… until I saw a post about a month ago which challenged me to feel into myself when I click on those ‘Like’ or ‘Share’ buttons: what is it about these particular posts/articles that I feel inclined to share with other people? What am I communicating? What am I actually feeling about them? Continue reading “Rising out of my Refuge in Writing – Reclaiming my Expression” →

YOU

~ womeninlivingness ~ 2 Comments

by Jeanette Macdonald, Healing Arts Practitioner, RN, New Zealand

Note from the author; Where I have put ‘* your name’, do just that and read it to yourself, or better still, have someone read it to you, with your name where it states to do so.

* your name

You have been a daughter, and, no doubt, a friend…

and you may have been a sister… a girlfriend… a wife…

a lover… a mother… a grandmother… a nurse…

a teacher… a doctor… a farmer…

an artist… a scientist…

a practitioner…

and so on

These are some of the many things you may have been and you may have done

But who you are is so much more Continue reading “YOU” →

Our Cycles App – Period and Full Moon Diary – Tracking My Expectations

~ womeninlivingness ~ 3 Comments

by Sarah Cloutier, Animation Producer, London, UK

“Expectation is the root of all heartache” – William Shakespeare

Wise words Will Shakespeare.

I realise I have been nurturing my expectations.

Not at all what I had expected to reveal while I am being more nurturing to myself with many other loving actions and thoughts. I am writing every day in the Our Cycles App about the small nurturing moments in my day: this could be talking with a friend, walking gently to the tube, smiling just for myself, allowing myself to make mistakes, being silly, dancing with myself, taking time to lay out my clothes before my shower or bath, not comparing myself to other women … a long list that grows every day! The loving ritual of writing down these loving actions means I can now see when I love myself even more: what is not love is even more obvious.

I have been using constant energy that has been invested in outcomes, from conversations, meetings, friends, acquaintances, people on the tube – everyone! I expect a certain type of response from people and I am then disappointed when they don’t come through. I expect colleagues at work to respond the way they did yesterday and when they don’t, I feel let down. I expect the young guy on the tube to get up and let me sit down on the way home from work, but when he doesn’t, I feel let down. I expect the person on the checkout to be friendly and when they are not, I feel disappointed. I’m also realising that when I see someone gloomy, I try to make them feel ‘better’ – to make them see they don’t have to be gloomy! I impose my expectations then I don’t understand when they don’t ‘get it’. Continue reading “Our Cycles App – Period and Full Moon Diary – Tracking My Expectations” →

Our Cycles – Period and Full Moon Diary App – Celebrating My Period

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by Rosie Bason, Mullumbimby, NSW

Attending a Women’s Group meeting

Recently I attended a women’s group and it was so supportive in so many ways. One of the things I have come away with and really put into practice is the use of Our Cycles – Period and Full Moon Diary App.

My observations from the meeting

I downloaded the Our Cycles App when it first came out and I had been using it every now and then… when I gave myself the permission and time to write things into it. It’s such a great App; the problem was I didn’t really feel that I was great enough to give myself the time each day to jot things down.

Women at the meeting shared how they used it – or their lack of use – and it really exposed my own. Since then I have been enjoying taking the time for me, to write down how my day was, and with all the different options for moods and feelings I have become aware of how awesome I feel most of the time… instead of heavy, sad, needy or such.

Ahhh….. the day before my period! Continue reading “Our Cycles – Period and Full Moon Diary App – Celebrating My Period” →

Painful Periods – Nurturing Doesn’t Always mean Horizontal!

~ womeninlivingness

by Leonne 

During my last cycle I had a very painful and heavy period. Thankfully, the most painful day of this period fell on a weekend and I did not have to work. Over the last year, I have been tracking my period using the OurCycles period diary app. Prior to this I had taken a contraceptive pill for 12 years to control a skin condition, so consequently I was very out of touch with my body’s natural rhythm (See my Blog: Acne, My Skin, My Diet and Me). As I have tracked my period I have found that when I have an intense month prior to my period, it is often more painful and heavier. Many things had come up for me in the month prior to my painful period, so I understood that my body was telling me something.

On the Saturday morning when I woke in pain, I was gentle and loving with myself.

  • I had a warm shower
  • dressed myself in soft comfortable clothing
  • got myself a blanket and snuggled up on the couch to watch some of my favourite TV shows.

Usually this course of action would make me feel better, however the pain seemed to intensify the more I ‘rested’. Continue reading “Painful Periods – Nurturing Doesn’t Always mean Horizontal!” →

My Body and Tattoo Designs

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by Nicole Serafin, Age 41, Tintenbar

By the time I was 30 I had 9 tattoo designs and a dozen piercings. I had always struggled with my body, a body that I never felt comfortable in; nor had I ever accepted the way that it was or the way that it felt.

Yes, I was a woman, but did I look or feel like a woman?

This I could not feel and so came the experimentation to create what I thought my body as a woman should be like. I constantly struggled with my looks, my weight – whether it be in excess or underweight – my personality; you name it, I was constantly in judgement of myself.

I began to colour & change my hairstyles, which was easy as I was working in a hairdressing salon from the age of 12 and had a mother who also supported me in doing this. Along with my hairstyles and colours I changed my style of dress, always experimenting… or so I thought I was experimenting. Continue reading “My Body and Tattoo Designs” →

Beauty Defined – Seeing Beyond the Physical Looks

~ womeninlivingness

by Zofia, Asia

WHAT DO MEN LOOK FOR IN WOMEN?

When I’ve asked guys about what it is they actually love about a woman, one they are perhaps dating or otherwise, the response is usually to do with any of the following…

  • Having nice or big eyes
  • Good skin or body
  • Long hair
  • Good dress sense
  • Perfume
  • Being a good laugh, funny
  • Confidence

But WHAT ELSE captures a guy’s interest apart from the physical look of a woman or her personality traits? Continue reading “Beauty Defined – Seeing Beyond the Physical Looks” →

LOVE – Falling in Love with My own Hair

~ womeninlivingness

by Rachel Mascord, Australia

Make-over aged 15

The first time I coloured my hair, I was fifteen years of age. It was in no way a gesture of teenage rebellion as my Mum took me to get it done. My naturally blonde hair had darkened to a colour that she called “mousey”. What an awful description for a colour! It was a word that said “drab”, “dull” and “plain”. In my desperation to be anything other than “drab, dull and plain” I readily agreed to the process, having recently been dismayed by my appearance in my Year 10 school photo. I thought myself too ugly for words. My hair was the focus of critical attention, and so willingly I surrendered to the offer for transformation via a hair makeover!

Hooked Transformation ­– from mousey to blond

So I was introduced to the wonderful world of hair colouring, and the medieval torture implement known as the streaking cap. For those who are unfamiliar with this device, it is a thick rubber cap that is pulled down over your head. You feel like every hair is being pulled out… slowly. It clenches on to your head for the entire period of the colouring process… about 40 minutes (feels like 4 hours). To add insult to injury, a fine crochet hook is used to gouge into the scalp to fish out strands of hair for bleaching. You sit, coated in blue peroxide, looking like a reject alien extra for Star Wars, but the result is a lovely, natural blonde effect.

That first appointment had me hooked. The pain and suffering were forgotten when my hair was revealed, all gleaming, blow-dried and sparkling. Ah! I was beautiful, blonde, not mousey, not drab and plain. Mum was delighted too, for her blonde daughter had been restored!

My mum’s relationship with her own hair was nothing short of tortured. She deeply hated her hair, was always dissatisfied with the colour, and I never recall her being happy with a cut. There was always something wrong, and she was always wishing her hair were different… straighter, blonder…. something else. She would tear the brush through her hair in self-loathing and fury, and it was truly awful to witness. I could never understand her self-hatred: why did she not just look in the mirror and see how lovely she was? She was a stunningly beautiful woman, but all she saw was hair that didn’t fit her picture of how hair should be. Continue reading “LOVE – Falling in Love with My own Hair” →

Relationships with Men Begin with My Relationship with Me

~ womeninlivingness

by Anonymous

I recently wrote a blog entitled Sex, relationships and a True Fairy Tale. Since then many things have unfolded for me (something I am sure many blog writers will relate to). Each time we publicly proclaim something (anonymously or not) we are asked to step up, and this time was no different.

Reading has been a big part of my life so it’s no surprise that my recent experience has reminded me of another type of story, the ‘Choose your own Adventure’ kind.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with the concept a ‘Choose your own Adventure’ book is one that asks you to make a choice at the end of each chapter. This choice then dictates the next choice that would be available to you and so on. Continue reading “Relationships with Men Begin with My Relationship with Me” →

Our Cycles App – The day BEFORE my Period Revelation

~ womeninlivingness

by Rosie Bason, Mullumbimby, NSW

Recently I attended a women’s group and it was so supportive in so many ways. One of the things I have come away with and really put into practice is the use of Our Cycles – Period and Full Moon Diary App.

I downloaded the Our Cycles App when it first came out and I had been using it every now and then… when I gave myself the permission and time to write things into it. It’s such a great App; the problem was I didn’t really feel that I was great enough to give myself the time each day to jot things down.

Women at the meeting shared how they used it – or their lack of use – and it really exposed my own. Since then I have been enjoying taking the time for me, to write down how my day was, and with all the different options for moods and feelings I have become aware of how awesome I feel most of the time… instead of heavy, sad, needy or such.

Ahhh….. the day before my period! Continue reading “Our Cycles App – The day BEFORE my Period Revelation” →