by Jennene, Brisbane
Being connected to my period cycle is something that has always been very normal for me. I grew up with a mother who encouraged me to be connected to my monthly cycle – and not to interfere with it in any way. She encouraged me to question why ‘The Pill’ was something that was so easily handed out to women without the understanding of the long term effects this would have on women’s bodies. It was a great foundation to have – and I am deeply appreciative of this.
So for the last 30 years of menstruating I stayed comfortable in this awareness of my cycle without really going any deeper than that. Whilst attending a recent Esoteric Developers Women’s Group (EDWG) meeting something amazing revealed itself to me; that is, I could feel how important it is for this awareness to be built upon, and not just be a laurel on which to rest.
Thinking that the contraceptive pill alone is the ‘great evil’ which interferes with our cycle lacks a deeper understanding… For there are many more yet subtle ways in which we interfere with our cycles and which also can cause horrific damage to our bodies and our (mental or emotional) states of being.
Speaking from my own experience, for many years (from the age of 15 to 39) I had ‘shut down’ and withdrawn myself, neither truly honouring nor celebrating my period cycle during that time. I was living in a perpetual state of nervousness, felt dis-empowered from the sexual harassment I’d been experiencing at work, all of which over time had led to anxiety attacks, depression and chronic fatigue. I tried many therapies which did bring relief and some remission for me, however it wasn’t until I started receiving Esoteric Healing that I finally started to feel the ‘true me’ via reconnecting to my cycle and rhythm once again. This for me is one of the true, profound values of attending the EDWG – that these subtleties, like the ones I had personally experienced are exposed and revealed so that we may reclaim the true woman that is within.
We have, and have always had, the opportunity to listen to our bodies.
Instead, for a very long time, we have chosen to override those feelings. Well before we allow the interference of a chemical or drug, we override what we feel from having fallen into the trap of playing certain ‘roles’ to get us through life. I know that for me the role of the ‘good daughter’, ‘mother’, ‘wife’, ‘carer’ etc. has run a script in my body for as long as I can remember. Most of us have stopped truly listening to what our bodies are telling us about how playing out the script of these roles is actually affecting our bodies. By trying to live up to the ‘ideal’ of what these roles meant, I put me last – having discounted the importance of questioning how tired I was at the end of each day, or whether I had taken on too much, and what was I really feeling about this? I conveniently pushed down the feelings of frustration and resentment that came with being an amazing carer for others, yet not feeling cared for, or supported by others (or more importantly, myself) – on top of juggling a multitude of roles, whilst all the while constantly being bombarded by beliefs around appearance, behaviour, what love and what being a woman is…
I can feel very clearly that all this is what I and other women have identified with; that this was ‘our lot’. And it has been easier to give up and use these roles as an excuse to not nurture what is innate and natural within each and every one of us.
Do I feel this has impacted my body and the way I live? Absolutely! I am very clearly aware of the areas of discomfort and hardening in my body which I can feel occur whenever I slip into a role, or allow myself to be influenced by a belief or ideal…
Women (and men) are now awakening and feeling the fact that we do have a choice, right now, to connect with what is deep within ourselves. Re-connecting to this, i.e. honouring what we truly feel and nurturing that which is already within and already known, we are able to feel how to express as a woman (or man).
Now is the time to get to know ourselves via the natural rhythms and / or of our periods.
Connecting deeply with our monthly cycles brings such an amazing awareness and understanding of how our body can, through the vehicle of our period, allow us to clear certain momentums we have been living; that there is a time within our cycle to have a fresh start and try a fresh new way of living. By connecting with our bodies’ rhythm in this way we are able to see and feel the impact of certain choices made, to then start with brand new choices made for the forthcoming cycle. Getting in touch with our periods or cycles has meant that I and lots of other women in our group have come to know so much more about ourselves. One of the simplest ways I support myself with this is by using the Our Cycles App (Period and Full Moon Diary). I love that it is accessible on my phone anytime I feel to record something and how clearly this App’s functionality allows me to see the patterns that I have been living in the previous month(s).
I’d be a millionaire if I had a penny for every time I have heard conversations around periods, menopause and childbirth in which all the old stereotypes get dragged out! Women will share their experiences around these events in their lives as a kind of horror story… and that to get through it somehow earns you a badge of honour. You know, the old “you wait and see when it’s your turn” statement!
But what if it doesn’t have to be that way?
What if by being connected to our cycles and delving deeper into the way we are choosing to live, we are feeling / able to feel the subtle changes in our bodies?
Perhaps getting our first period isn’t then fraught with the usual anxiety (because it suddenly happens without warning) or laced with a defiant claim about ‘women’s power’, but instead celebrated that it is naturally a time of honouring and fragility…
What if peri-menopause or menopause wasn’t an experience of ticking off a range of symptoms and a period of uncertainty about when ‘it’ will end, but rather a celebration of a deepening connection with our bodies and a continuation of our cycle? I know that this period / time is approaching for me and I love feeling the very subtle changes occurring in my body.
Being connected to my cycle helps me to see that I don’t have to ‘do’ or ‘try’. It really is about feeling the power, the delicateness, the loveliness within, and choosing to honour that. It empowers me to know that I am not on a timetable or timeline that my period or my body needs to fit in with, but rather in rhythms and cycles that can be and are felt from within or by my body all month and beyond…
Connecting to and understanding our unique cycles or rhythm means we have an opportunity to experience these qualities in all their glory by living them in every moment of every day, if we so choose.